when a snake and a mice can laugh together...

i haven't feel these feelings for long time, the feeling when you drop yourself in happiness and got yourself are about to puke because of these...

today i spent my day on the road, country road can say...
when we just laugh, doing silly things, eat, dancing, sleep, debate, speak politic, speak bout celebrity and talk about all other things. so happy to be in this situation, when i just can laugh without any burden at my shoulder.

this is a story when a snake and a mice can laugh together without thinking how to kill each other...

have you ever feel that way?
when you and your boyfriend and girlfriend talk about something to defense himself and kill you at a first stab. there's no hater, no bad feelings, just the feelings of the victory...

then when you can laugh together because of everything, you will feel like never be something.
try to do this at home... (silly rite?)
but fun, really...
forget about anything else, feel the love, spent your time to laugh until you got butterflies in your stomach, and please... leave all the bad things that you two has problem about, laugh because of everything...

maybe you never thing that you are a snake a mice or any others thing, but actually, there is something inside yourself that made you realize that you are... you are that beast or that cutie...

try to laugh than you will know...
oh yea, don't imagine to laugh that way.
you will know when you've had it...

love you....
-Winda.R-

Finally...

finally!! i arrive at home, smell the fresh air of Palembang, meet my dogs and my stupid brothers...
ahahahhaa... sorry guys... eh, i also already eat fried catfish which is called pecel lele here... ahahah... so happy.... hmmm.... i think I'm going to drown myself in these happiness for two months... see ya....

ahahaha....
i love u Palembang.....
i love u Indonesia...

love u....
-winda-

The feeling of being at home...

last night i woke up, at 5 am which means 4 am at Indonesia. i tried to sleep again but i cannot, remember that this is the hungry ghost month... silly isn't it? then i turn on my hand phone, try to calm myself down by listening to jack Johnson's music. silent dawn, slow easy music, just made me feels like being at home...
i miss that feeling, when i just lay on my wide bed, at my fresh room, soft brown colour, cold air con, and fresh apple smell. i miss it so much...
even i know that i will be at home next week,smell my dog's shit again...
i feel like why it takes so long to be on that day, i kept waiting and waiting.
i want to hear my mother voice again, even i can hear it everyday on the phone, but it will be so nice if i can hear it directly read her mouth movement.
i miss to play with my naughty dog, all this noise of their barks,
i miss to chase my Little brother and slap him because he keep on make fun of me,
i miss to be make fun of my older brother,
i miss to feel Palembang's pollution air,
i miss to be in the car looking at other people sweating riding their motorcycle or the opposite,
i miss my own bathroom,
i miss my big warm blanket,
i miss my wise father,
i miss to fight with my boyfriend,
i miss to make whatever food i like even at last everybody will say that it's nice after i show my patheic face,
i miss my store, all that fruits smell ,
i miss to decorate juices that i have made for one hour long,
i miss to take my oldest dog for walk even he got a very terrible breath,
i miss to spend myself almost an hour to be naked choosing what outfit i should wear,
i miss to hang out with my friends talking about other people,
i miss to shop a lot of things for my weekly supply,
i miss to talk to my customer,
i miss to hug my boyfriend while he's riding his motorcycle,
i miss to hold my mom and my dad hand,
i miss to scold my brothers because they don't want to study at tuition,
i miss to change something at my room,
i miss to watch Indonesian gossip infotainment,
i miss to eat Indonesian foods,
i miss to walk among all Indonesian,
i miss family,
i miss my boyfriend,
i miss my Friends,
i miss my dog,
i miss my room,
i miss my house,
i miss my car,
i miss my juicer,
i miss my maids,
i miss my store,
i miss my employees,
i miss my Palembang,
i miss my Indonesia...
and i hate when i have to leave it, standing at the airport waiting for my departure time and when i have to take off leaving all the things i always miss...
i hate to leave my beloved country even its not a perfect country to live in, but can you see how incredible our government is taking care of our thousands island can you see even for the small country they still cant stabilize their own country. Indonesia is a wonderful country...
i love my country...
i love you all...

That married woman...

yesterday morning, two girls that i recently knew has became woman married* . married in their own religion tradition. They married on mosque with their Muslim leader which pronounce them husband and wife.
i don't know what really good about being married.
is it good to life together, share everything they want, share their time, their sadness and their happiness together?
we can do it on relationship with our boyfriend minus life together and minus kids.
is it really that fun?
these few days i got a preview of the marriage situation. sit together, have dinner, teach their kids, scold their kids, wathcing TV, family discussion, etc
and 2 seconds ago i realize that its fun being a children of the married couple, but is it fun for being a mother in a marriage circle?
are they really ready to become a mother?
my friend Benatha Hardani and my sister* Giovanny...
they have steeped out from the single cage.
you know, what i meant by single here is not being married. no matter you have your fiance or you boyfriend, you are still single now.
back to this married people...
last night after i heard about my sister marriage from my father and my mother, i cant describe my self for being happy or sad, neither my parent. are they happy? or are they sad but keep showing that they are happy?
this morning, when i open my eyes, i remember the feelings last night. when i watched the opening of Beijing Olympic. why i felt so fed up, and so sad.
is it because i afraid that my parent being hurt? is it because i lost someone i usually know as my sister? or because i misunderstood that feeling?
i cant help but wonder, is it the feelings that every sister in the world felt when their sisters married?
i hope there will be nobody being hurt or hurt anybody. i hope everything will be fine.
i hope, they will live happily ever after...
but still, this remind me of one thing...
i my parents are hurt, then don't ever think of being part of this family anymore...
i hope i made the right thought...